Comedian John Oliver blessed the airwaves with a meaty Florida takedown, spending nearly half an hour Sunday dragging the state's hostile takeover of New College of Florida.

On HBO's "Last Week Tonight," Oliver touched on college President Richard Corcoran's bloated salary, a curious dumpster full of books and other farcical facets of the Sarasota school's MAGA makeover. He distilled the debacle into a tragic thesis: "They have destroyed a rare haven for gentle nerds."

From one gentle nerd to another, indeed. Oliver, who has called Gov. Ron DeSantis "business Fred Flintstone," loves to rag on Florida with good reason. Though I personally volunteer to come on the show and defend Floridians who have skin thicker than a frozen iguana in the bed of a Chevy Baja, it won't make a difference. The state's comic potential flows like the Gulf of America.

Florida is a prime target for Oliver's freewheeling format, which leaves room for longer, weedier takes. You try blending analysis of merit-based scholarships and genitalia jokes in a 20-second bit. You can't!

If the folks at "Last Week Tonight" enjoyed roasting New College, they're going to adore these irresistibly corrupt stories from Florida.

Environmental scandals

Floridians are feral about their love of the state's natural splendor, so it's a wonder why DeSantis keeps playing poker with protected lands. Take your pick of astonishing stories. How about the smelly $83.3 million purchase of a crappy slice of property in Destin? Or the clandestine scheme to build golf courses, hotels and pickleball courts across wild state parks?

Speaking of the latter, a whistleblower claimed he learned of the plans via, yes, a Post-It note. Furthermore, he said a supervisor made him hide evidence in a digital folder titled "DirectTV Subscription Info." This story writes its own jokes, a Pepperidge Farm gift basket stocked full of cheese.

Hope Florida

Here we have a scandal even bigger than the one involving, shudder, pickleball. In this melee, the administration diverted millions of public dollars from the poor and sick to pay for lawyers, consultants and ads. The financial sleight of hand was designed to defeat amendments that would have opened access to abortion and recreational marijuana, causes DeSantis and friends didn't like.

It's a thick one. Oliver would need at least 20 minutes to delve into the minutiae of this slippery case, from the nonprofit element to the Casey DeSantis of it all. But imagine the TV potential of our host connecting red strings on a corkboard in the manner of a true crime sleuth living in an abandoned shed.

James Uthmeier

"Last Week Tonight" could sustain a whole show with Florida's attorney general, Billy Zane to the state's "Titanic."

Uthmeier, who is running to keep his appointed position, is connected to the Hope Florida scandal. At least one Republican colleague has accused him of fraud and money laundering. He's credited with suggesting the idea for failed Everglades detainee camp Alligator Alcatraz; he starred in a promotional video for it alongside metal riffs last heard on a free karaoke app.

He loves to invite himself to proverbial parties, sending threatening letters all over the state invoking culture buzzwords. He waded into a routine parental rights case in which everyone was minding their own business, spinning a deeply cynical view of surrogacy as slavery. Oh, and he's being paid $100,000 for a side job teaching at the University of Florida for two hours per week. Two is not a typo. Do your worst, Oliver.

Mermaids

OK, let's lighten up before we need cardiac intervention. Oliver should make haste to this balmy paradise and wiggle into a mermaid tail. One reporter did so at Weeki Wachee in a feat of physics that almost ended her. But, you know, she's fine! It's time for the friendly Brit to butter up his lower body and sink into more delicious Sunshine State ephemera. Florida has so much to offer a program like his.

Stephanie Hayes is a columnist at the Tampa Bay Times in Florida. Follow her at @stephrhayes on Instagram.

Photo credit: Glenn Carstens-Peters at Unsplash